It looks like Nathan Deal is going to be the next governor of Georgia. It’s not a bad thing, really. Georgia is such a nice place to say you’re not originally from. For people outside of Georgia, Nathan Deal is under investigation for unethical behavior and he’s probably going to have to declare bankruptcy when he takes office. At least he’ll have a job and a permanent address.
What’s disturbing about the race is how little the democrats have learned about winning political races. Sure, every now and then the Republicans do something really, really stupid and the democrats get two years in office. Without republican stupidity, however, the dems are pretty worthless on the campaign trail. What a shame. To prove to all y’all (a little southern to get you ready for what’s next) that only members of the party inner circle are really stupid, here are the top 5 ways the democratic challenger Roy Barnes, could win the race.
1) Roy could declare the following: “I am a democrat, not an Obama-crat”
Roy needs to distance himself from the party elite. He must run as a centrist, working on jobs, deficits, and fighting with Washington on education and sending our boys to the Middle East. Roy needs to be the adult.
2) Roy could say the following: “I don’t want a pledge, I want a plan. Put your money where your mouth is”
Nathan Deal has a plan. It won’t work, but it’s a plan. Roy should call Nathan on the plan. Ask him if he’ll resign if he doesn’t meet targets. Then call Nathan a faker and a liar when he doesn’t step up. Call him a Nancy-boy wimp. Tell him his shorts zip up the side.
3) Roy could run a media campaign claiming Nathan Deal is Obama-Lite
Nathan Deal has very limited government experience, just like Obama. Deal is making promises that will be impossible to keep, just like Obama. Obama is a socialist, Deal is a communist (he wants to have state control of reproductive rights and he wants the state to say who can get married and what is right in a very narrow and incomplete reading of the Bible. Deal may as well be in China given his social policies).
4) Roy could remind people that Deal is a Republican, and Republicans are cowards. As Deal to renounce the party for its poor treatment of military personnel. Ask him to rebuke the Republican elite who hid American coffins in a hanger and declared victory too soon. Tell him that sitting in the big chair means making the tough decisions.
5) Here’s the big one – tell the people of Georgia that Nathan Deal will get them killed. Pure and simple, Nathan Deal is hazardous to your health. Part of Nathan Deal’s plan is to reduce regulations and oversight of businesses. You know, the people who are supposed to make sure your food is safe and products are not going to kill you. It turns out that profit is more important that consumer safety.
Here’s the commercial I would run, I would show a heart monitor with a voice over.The frightened mother is saying “Doctor, what’s wrong with Jessica?” The doctor would respond, “it’s a bad case of food poisoning, what did she eat?” The mother replies, “nothing special, we were out at dinner and…” The doctor cuts in “do you know if the food came from Georgia? You know, we’ve been having a lot of problems since Nathan Deal was elected. With no government oversight, businesses are cutting corners. We’ve had a lot of children in the hospital lately.” The mom now sounds even more frightened “what?” The doctor replies “many fly by night businesses have moved in taking advantage of the tax cuts and give-aways. The owners are making money, but they’re ruining the Georgia food industry – and they’re making people sick.”
Suddenly, the monitor goes flat line “beeeeeeeeeeep” The mother shouts “Jessica, Jessica, wake up honey” The noise fades. Depending on how the campaign feels, the tag could be “Nathan Deal, hazardous to your health”, or “Nathan Deal, he’ll make you sick” or “Vote NO on Nathan Deal, for your family’s health” Maybe a big circle with a slash through the name “Deal” and the words “protect your family”
Of course, Roy’s campaign has already given up so don’t expect anything interesting. They tried to paint Nathan Deal as unethical, but Republicans are unethical by nature so Roy’s campaign simply confirmed what Republicans and Democrats already know.
Stay tuned – cause the devil is in Georgia and he’s looking for an election to steal!